... Less (Hope) by Tendy K

My glass is half empty,
My insecurities are quite full;
Overflowing the brim,
I can feel the pressure of an overdose.

My confidence is bipolar,
It cannot decide whether we are up or down.
Swings in all sorts of directions,
It sees things that cannot be heard.

My pride walked out on me;
Two days ago.
It said it needs someone stronger,
It hated feeling defeated.
This selfless attachment thing was nonsense.

Yesterday, I met misery,
He embraced me,
He was so calm, very calm,
Showed me my wrongs,
Displayed my righteous flaws
He told me it was okay,
It was fine to have self pity,
To be with him for days on end,
He made me wear shame,
Said it was beautiful, my shroud.
He was my joy,
Took my under till I drowned,
In moments of fear I was not alone,
He was my armor,
A truth I understood, he would not leave me.

But today he left,
He sailed off in my tears.

Solitude,
I have come this far,
With you, my crossroads reached,
Numb, I crawl, I stand, and I cower
Stagger towards you, the center,
But there is only one road left,
One road to follow? Is that all?
Like an allure it calls,
Where are the other roads?
Am I to go? Where I am to go?

Lonesome,
Yes I am,
Softly, softly, I close my eyes,
It’s a beautiful dark.


Tendy K, 23rd February 2010